Rolando McClain gave a better fake name to police than we thought


In our post from Tuesday about Rolando McClain’s latest arrest, we invited you to share your best guess as to what false identity the Raiders linebacker provided police. It’s safe to say none of you would have come close.

We were expecting a “Dick Hertz,” maybe a “Mike Hunt” or two or even “Ron Mexico.” But none of those—or anything else, really—holds a light to the amazing name McClain actually gave Decatur, Ala., police. The Decatur Daily has the details:

Officers arrested NFL player Rolando McClain on a charge of giving a false name to law enforcement Tuesday after he signed a citation for overly dark window tint as “(Expletive) y’all,” Decatur police said.

When a patrol supervisor asked McClain to put his real name on the ticket, McClain told the sergeant, “That is my name,” said police spokesman Lt. John Crouch.

Crouch said McClain, 23, who was booked into Decatur City Jail shortly after 4 p.m. on the misdemeanor and the window tint violation, could have avoided arrest simply by signing his name to the ticket.

He was released on $1,000 cash bail a short time later.

“I’m falsely accused of everything,” the Oakland Raiders linebacker said before climbing into his white Chevrolet Silverado Z-71 and driving from the parking lot of City Hall. “It’s corrupt. It’s terrible.”

Under Alabama law, a person commits a crime if he gives a false name to an officer “with intent to mislead the officer.” […]

Crouch said when [officer Derek] Annerton asked for a driver’s license and proof of insurance, McClain said, “You know who I am.”

After this whole ordeal and all the headaches over the last two months, the Raiders probably can’t wait to part ways with Fuck Y’all.

Please note the above driver’s license is a fabrication. It you thought it was real, please stay away from the Internet.

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