Chris Kluwe is the new Raiders punter, or at least one of them. (He seems to integrating into Oakland quite well, by the way.) He’s also very well-known for his steadfast and vocal support of gay rights. And that much garnered him an invite to hang out with President Barry O. at the LGBT Pride Month reception at La Casa Blanca, or, better known by it’s duller official name, the White House, on June 13.
It’s going to be a poppin’ affair. Thing is, Kluwe won’t be able to attend. The Raiders have mandatory minicamp that day. He’ll have to RSVP “no.” Good teammate, that Kluwe guy.
To prove his devotion to football and the Raiders, he tweeted a photo of the email he sent to the White House, declining the president’s invitation. And in typical Kluwe form, it’s pretty funny. That photo is seen above. Because I don’t want you to have to hold a microscope up to your computer screen, here’s a transcription of the letter:
Dear Mr. President (Or whoever reads these things, I’m sure he’s probably pretty busy (hello underappreciated email answering person!)),
It is with great regret that I must decline your invitation to attend the Reception at the White House for LGBT Pride Month on June 13. I would really, really, REALLY like to be there, but unfortunately, not even the President of the United States is allowed to supersede an NFL mandatory mini-camp practice (at least insomuch as I understand the new CBA, though I could possibly be mistaken), and as a current member of the Oakland Raiders I owe it to both my teammates and my coaches to be fully prepared for the upcoming season.
I am tremendously grateful for the opportunity though and if anything else were to ever come up it would be my distinct honor to attend. Unless we have a game. Or practice. Or mandatory hot yoga classes (we don’t really have those).
p.s. If you really wanted to, I’m sure I could make a late supper if an F35 were to pick me up at the field right after practice. Just saying.
p.p.s. Please don’t do that. Then I’d be *that guy* on the team. You know. *That* guy. (Plus it also seems an unnecessary waste of taxpayer dollars.)
The floodgates for Raiders/Super Bowl/White House jokes are now open.
H/T CBS Sports